Ben's Calzone

Hello on the 27th day of the Vegan Month of Food and the sixth day of my Parks and Recreation theme week! I'm also pretty excited because this is my 100th post! (I would have hit this milestone sooner had I not deleted my first several posts, including those of Vegan MoFo 2010, but ah well...)

Ben's Calzone

In "The Comeback Kid" (season 4, episode 11), Ben, having resigned from his job as assistant city manager, has been keeping himself occupied by shooting a (very short) claymation video and learning to make calzones. (Leslie and the rest of the parks department have been planning a comeback for her city council campaign, but when everything goes wrong, she decides to hire Ben as her campaign manager.)

Chris: So, Ben, why calzones?

Ben: Glad you asked, Chris. You know, there's fast-food hamburgers, there's fast-food Mexican, there's fast-food Chinese, blah, blah, blah. Have you ever wondered why there isn't a fast-food option for Italian food?

Chris: What about pizza?

Ben: "Pizza? Never heard of it!" That's what people will be saying in 20 years because pizza is old news, Chris. Pizza is your grandfather's calzone.

Chris: I never thought of it that way.

Ben: What I'm talking about is a portable, delicious meal that is its own container. It's a whole new spin on Italian fast, casual dining.

Chris: Amazing!

Ben: Now, you of all people will like this: I'm going to use low-fat ingredients.

Chris: Game-changer!

Ben: And I will call my new Italian fast casual eatery the Low-Cal Calzone Zone.

Chris: That idea is literally the greatest idea I have ever heard in my life.

Chris (to camera): That idea is terrible.

Ingredients:

(crust)

--1 Bob's Red Mill 16 oz. package Gluten Free Pizza Crust mix

--2 T flaxseed meal + 6 T water (replaces the 2 eggs)

--1 1/2 cups warm water

--2 T olive oil

--yeast packet (included in the pizza crust package)

(toppings)

--tomato sauce

--shredded Daiya (both mozzarella and cheddar)
--vegan pepperoni slices (I used Lightlife's Smart Deli Pepperoni)

Directions:

(Preheat oven to 425°F.) Combine yeast and water in a large bowl; let stand a few minutes. Add the flaxseed meal and olive oil, stir. Add the pizza crust mix; stir until combined. Split dough in half, leave in bowl, covered for 20 minutes so it can rise. To make two calzones, take one of the doughs, split it in half, and spread out two round crusts on the greased baking tray. Bake for 7 minutes without toppings. (Store second unused dough, wrapped in plastic wrap, in the fridge.) Remove from oven, add tomato sauce to one half of each crust, then Daiya and vegan pepperoni on top.* Fold the empty half over to cover the toppings. Crimp the edges closed with a fork (if possible; wasn't for me, oops!). Add a bit of olive oil atop the calzones and make a few small cuts in the top, then bake for 9 minutes. Remove from oven and let cool; the calzones will be much hotter than a pizza. Serve and enjoy!

*To use up some leftovers, I (over)filled one of the calzones with some chopped yellow onion and Boca chick'n instead of pepperoni.

This was my first time making calzones, and while they were messy (and I was unable to get them fully closed), they were still delicious. I think it would be fun to experiment with different fillings (the two versions I made were both great), but all in all, I'm more of a pizza person. Sorry, Ben! 

Bonus quotes from the episode:

Leslie (to her former campaign managers): I just had a big meeting with my new advisory board, and they are brilliant and amazing. They're real killers.

Andy (in background): Leslie? I tried to make ramen in the coffee pot, and I broke everything.

Leslie: Thank you, Andy; I'll be right in.

In other vegan news, today is Hug a Vegan Day! So here's a big hug for all my vegan readers and fellow bloggers!

Mystery, however, is rather skeptical of all this hugging going on...

Peace. :)

April and Andy's Frisbee Chili

Hello on the 24th day of the Vegan Month of Food, and day three of my Parks and Recreation theme week!

April and Andy's Frisbee Chili

In "Jerry's Painting" (season 3, episode 11), April and Andy have recently lost their roommate Burly. Ben had been staying at a Pawnee motel, but once it gets bedbugs, he starts looking for a new place to stay. April and Andy agree to take him in as their new roommate (and tell him the rent is much more than it actually is). When Ben moves in, the place is a mess; the next morning, he sees April and Andy using Frisbees as plates and sharing a single fork, passing it back and forth in between bites.

Ben: I'm sorry, are you eating turkey chili off of a Frisbee?

Andy: (laughs) Yeah, it's pretty cute, right?

Ben: No... Do you know what "cute" means?

April: What have you got against turkey chili for breakfast?

Ben: What have you guys got against washing dishes?

April: We don't have any dishes, OK? Burly took them all when he left. Now I bet you feel like a jerk.

Ingredients:

--Lightlife Smart Ground Mexican Style

--1 plum tomato, chopped

--1/3 yellow onion, chopped (and briefly sautéed)

--8 heaping spoonfuls tomato sauce

--cumin

--oregano

steamy :)

Spray a pan with cooking spray, heat on medium. Add the Smart Ground, stirring and breaking it up. After 5 minutes, add the tomato and onion, stir. After another 5 minutes, add the tomato sauce, stirring again. Add a bit of cumin and oregano, then cover and turn heat to low. Stir and serve on a "Frisbee" after 5 minutes. (I didn't have any Frisbees lying around the apartment, and I'm not quite sure I'd want to eat on one anyway, so I just used a Tupperware plate that was a bit of a Frisbee look-alike.)

The Frisbee chili was good, but even though my simple version was likely more involved than how April and Andy prepared it, it still wasn't really much of a meal by itself. I have a fair amount of leftovers, and I plan to use them as additions to other meals (ex., burritos, pasta, etc.). All in all, it was fun, though!

Bonus quote from the episode (video clip here):

Ron: (introducing the art show) OK, everyone! Shut up! (claps once) And look at me. Welcome to “Visions of Nature.” This room has several paintings in it; some are big, some are small. People did them, and they are here now. I believe that after this is over, they'll be hung in government buildings. Why the government is involved in an art show is beyond me. I also think it's pointless for a human to paint scenes of nature when they can just go outside and stand in it. Anyway, please do not misinterpret the fact that I am talking right now as genuine interest in art and attempt to discuss it with me further. End of speech.

Here's a picture of Mystery and a box that caught her interest; she got shy once I took out my camera, though.

Peace. :)

Ben's Mac & Cheese Pizza

Hello on the 23rd day of the Vegan Month of Food, and the second day of my Parks and Recreation theme week (and another perfect match for Mac-and-Cheese Monday).

Ben's Mac & Cheese Pizza

In "Jerry's Retirement" (season 5, episode 20), Leslie and Ben were supposed to have a day off together, but right as they were leaving, Jerry got up to say his good-byes. No one had remembered that Jerry was retiring that day, so no celebration had been planned. Instead of having a day off, Leslie becomes determined to help Jerry achieve the goals he'd had when he first started working for the government (and only briefly gets distracted by her excitement for Ben's dinner plans, video clip here and dialogue below).

Leslie: I just can't let Jerry leave here with nothing and go home to an empty life.

Ben: Well, I'll help with anything, just promise we'll do it quickly. I'm making us a mac & cheese pizza for dinner...

Leslie: Mac & cheese pizza?! (gets up from desk)

Ben: Yeah... (looks nervous)

Leslie: You're making that?! (heads around desk to Ben)

Ben: Yeah... (smiles)

Leslie: Huhhh! (starts making out with Ben)

I figured that it must be some pretty good pizza to get that kind of a reaction, so I wanted to try making it myself.

For the mac & cheese:

I used the mac & cheese recipe I posted about last Monday: Hot Dog with Mac & Cheese.

For the crust:

I simply took out the leftover second dough from the fridge and let it sit for 30 minutes before spreading it out on the greased baking tray and baking it for 9 minutes at 425°F. (For instructions on making the dough using the Bob's Red Mill mix, see this post from Friday: Pizza.)

After removing the crust from the oven, add the mac & cheese atop the crust spoonful by spoonful, spreading it out. Add some shredded Daiya mozzarella, pepper, and garlic salt on top. Put pizza in oven for 9 minutes. Remove, allow to cool slightly, slice, and serve (I had some baby carrots and potato chips on the side.)

The mac & cheese pizza was a bit messier to slice and eat than regular pizza. It was good, though I don't know if it's something I'll make again. (I think I prefer more traditional pizzas.) But all in all, it was yummy and fun.

Bonus quotes from the episode:

Jerry: (reading from plaque) Jerry Gergich Memorial Conference Room. R.I.P. (confused look)

Ben: Oh, the guy at the plaque store thought you had died. It was a rush job, so we didn't have time to change it.

Leslie: It doesn't matter; we can just pretend it means “retire in peace.”

In other news, today is Celebrate Bisexuality Day (also known as Bi Pride Day and Bi Visibility Day)! 

image from: http://taskforceblog.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/bi_pride_graphic.jpg

Mystery briefly got into the spirit by modeling this fun scarf.

Peace. :)

Ben's Chicken Soup and JJ's Waffles

Hello on the 22nd day of the Vegan Month of Food! I'm so excited that today is the autumnal equinox; fall has officially begun! Today is also exciting because it begins my Parks and Recreation theme week!

For those of you who haven't seen the show, it's about the local government of the fictional Pawnee, Indiana, with a focus on the staff of the parks and recreation department. It's filmed in the mockumentary style of The Office; the characters are aware of the cameras and have one-on-one "interviews" with them to elaborate on what occurs in the main action. The fifth season ended with Leslie Knope (previously the deputy director of the parks and recreation department) being threatened with a recall of her current position as a city councilor. (Parks and Recreation starts its sixth season this Thursday.)

Ben's Chicken Soup and JJ's Waffles

In "Flu Season," the second episode of the third season, a bunch of people in Pawnee (including April, Leslie, and Chris) come down with the flu. Ann, a nurse, is caring for them at the hospital, but Leslie successfully escapes in order to do her presentation to local business owners for the upcoming harvest festival. She's brought back to the hospital afterwards to recover, and Ben stops by with his family's traditional chicken soup, as well as waffles from JJ's Diner. Leslie being Leslie, she's only interested in the waffles.

Ben: (appears in doorway of Leslie's hospital room)

Leslie: Oh, hey!

Ben: Hey there. I got you some waffles here, courtesy of JJ's Diner, and chicken soup, courtesy of me.

Leslie: I'll take the waffles, thank you... (takes the waffle container)

Ben: (awkwardly holds out the soup container, then sets it down on the night stand)

….

Ben: (heading out) Oh, uh, left the chicken soup there just in case, it's an old family recipe, it's not a big deal but...

Leslie: Thank you for that.

Ben: OK. (leaves room)

Leslie: (takes bite of waffle)

For the soup:

--2 cups vegan chicken broth

--1/2 cup rotini

--1/4 cup carrots and celery, cut

--bit of turmeric (less than 1/4 tsp), some pepper, and a pinch of ginger

--1/2 Boca chik'n patty, cooked and cut up into smaller pieces

Bring the broth to a boil, add rotini, lower heat a bit, add carrots and celery after about 15 minutes, then the spices, and finally, the pieces of "chicken." Turn heat to low and cover for a bit, then serve.

For the waffles:

--2 Van's Gluten Free Ancient Grains Original waffles

--1 can coconut milk, set in fridge overnight

--3 T confectioner's sugar

--raspberries (or other fruit of your choice)

Prepare the whipped cream according to the directions here on the lunchboxbunch.com: How-to: Whipped Coconut Cream from Coconut Milk. Heat up the waffles, add raspberries, and serve with the whipped cream on the side; dollop on as needed.

The waffles were really good, and it was fun to make my own whipped cream, which turned out delicious (it wasn't as light and fluffy as I'd hoped, but that was likely because I didn't have a hand beater, just a whisk). In true Leslie fashion, I left the soup alone (I put it in the fridge and had it later for dinner with some crackers).

Bonus quote from the episode (video clip here):

Andy: Leslie, I typed your symptoms into the thing up here, and it says you could have network connectivity problems.

Mystery was very interested in this meal; Zach had to hold her back so I could eat without her trying to get into my food.

Peace. :)